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House of the Dragon S1, Ep 6 Review

Until tonight, I thought the Lannisters were the most messed up family in Westeros. Emotionally abusive dad, incestuous twins, and alcoholic son. However, after seeing what House Targaryen was like in their heyday, it’s clear that I was mistaken. The Targaryens take the top spot as Westeros’ most messed up family. A family that’s only staying civil while the King lives. Once he dies, the House of the Dragon will go to war…and it already has its first casualties.

New Girls on the Block

This episode marks the debut of Emma D’arcy and Olivia as the now adult Princess Rhaenyra and Queen Alicent, and they hit the ground running and don’t stop. I was skeptical that we couldn’t replace Milly Alcock and Emily Carey as the female leads, but these post-timeskip actors do a wonderful job. In their first scene as Rhaenyra, we see Emma play the Princess as she goes through the labors of childbirth, which the show depicts in vivid detail. Ten years have not softened Rhaenyra one bit, as no sooner has she given birth than she heads off to see Alicent with her newborn son, even while trailing blood on the way.

While Rhaenyra’s now the mother to three sons, there’s a problem, and everyone but the King seems to know it: they’re not Laenor’s sons. They’re all bastards, born from Rhaenyra and Ser Harwin Strong of the City Watch. And the more that are born, the more frustrated Alicent gets. Her attitude makes it clear: she doesn’t understand how her husband doesn’t see that his daughter’s undermining the marriage he worked to build.

In all fairness, Viserys might be aware of what’s going on, but chooses to ignore it. What matters to him is Rhaenyra’s sons are of his blood, regardless of who the father is, though everyone else may not feel the same way. Or maybe he’s just deluding himself in the hopes that his family will be as happy as he wants them to be.

Targaryen Family Is Messed Up

Truthfully, the whole Targaryen family is messed up, best shown through how Rhaenyra and Alicent’s kids interact with each other. Rhaenyra’s eldest boys, Jace and Luke (they’re nicknames) are nice enough, but it’s Alicent’s kids that are odd. Aemond laments how he’s the only Targaryen without a dragon, leading him to be the butt of a cruel prank by his brother.

As for Aegon? He acts like a spoiled brat. We see him standing naked on a window doing his…business, which is not something I want to remember. He’s basically a foolish boy.

Daemon Has a Happy Family, Though.

Ironically, the family that has it best ends up being Daemon’s new family with Laena Velaryon. They’re now living in Pentos as guests with their dragons, and this marks the first time that we see Vhagar, the largest dragon alive and the last one from the time of Aegon the Conqueror. She easily dwarfs all other dragons and is a triumph of CGI. 

In other words, Daemon goes from being unhappy to having a loving wife, two daughters, and another one on the way. Best of all, he’s away from the toxic environment of King’s Landing.

If only fate would be kind enough to spare the kids the heartache of what’s to come. Westeros doesn’t work like that, though.

Scandal Rocks the Royal Family

After what he did at the end of last week’s episode, Ser Criston’s gone from golden boy to hated by the show’s fans, and it only gets worse from there. This week, he provokes fights between the Targaryen kids, and when Ser Harwin steps in, he accuses him the things he’s guilty of. So, Harwin beats him up, and the resulting scandal opens the floodgates.

And from here, the bodies start dropping.

The First Big Casualties

I never mentioned him last week, but there’s another member of House Strong, Larys Strong. And he’s this era’s Littlefinger, acting the mild-mannered servant in public. In private, though, he’s just as cunning. Maybe even more so, to the point that Alicent fears him.

Case in point, when Lord Strong takes Hardin back to Harrenhal to quell the rumors of Rhaenyra’s children, he burns them alive. He wipes out his own family, which isn’t new, but still disturbing. It also prompts Rhaenyra to take her family and leave for Dragonstone, depriving her of her power base.

Meanwhile, Laena dies from the stresses of childbirth in Pentos. In a moment meant to contrast Viserys’ decision to sacrifice his wife to save their child, Daemon hesitates to take the same route. However, Laena takes the choice out of his hands by approaching Vhagar and having the ancient dragon immolate her. It’s a tragic example of female agency and one that leaves everyone saddened. 

A Family Divided Against Itself

Thus, the episode ends with the die already being cast. The first members of the house of the dragon have fallen, and more will follow.

Watching all this, I’m mentally berating everyone for pushing things to this point out of pride. At one point, Rhaenyra even offers an olive branch by promising to marry Jace to Alicent’s daughter, Helaena. The latter refuses to marry her daughter to a bastard, and another chance to make peace flies out the window.

Right now, I’m glad I promised not to become attached to the characters in House of the Dragon. It lets me see the entire Targaryen family for what they’re being: dumb. And once King Viserys dies, fire and blood will consume them all. Meanwhile, I’ll be munching on popcorn, lamenting the foolishness of everyone.

That, and the sight of Prince Aegon doing his business in a window. Who does that?!? Even if that was David Tennant’s son playing him.

I Give “The Princess and the Queen” a 4.5/5

House of the Dragon Ep 5 Review

WHAT. THE HECK. JUST HAPPENED? I knew knives would come out on House of the Dragon, since this is Westeros, but damn. I didn’t expect that to happen so soon! We are now past the point of no return for House Targaryen. In what should be a “joyous” royal wedding, instead becomes a tragedy. And for once, Daemon wasn’t at fault.

No, seriously, Daemon wasn’t at fault this time. 

In the episode’s opening minutes, we get our first look at Daemon’s “bronze bitch,” Rhea Royce. It’s also the last because Daemon kills her.

The books say Rhea died when she fell off her horse. The show takes some creative liberties that would make George RR Martin proud. Daemon tricks Rhea into causing her own fall…and then just kills her. The knives have come out, and Dameon’s taking crap from no one.

A Mutually Beneficial Relationship?

For the players in King’s Landing, though, there’s plenty of crap to go around, especially for Rhaenyra and Set Criston Cole. Rhaenyra heads to Driftmark to meet her betrothed, Ser Laenor Velaryon. On the surface, it seems like an ideal match. Both houses are Valryian, and both have dragons. However, there’s an issue: Laenor’s gay, and Rhaenyra knows it. While the parents discuss inheritance, Rhaenyra and Laenor come to an understanding. They essentially agree that after they do their duty, they’ll have an open relationship. It’s not that bad of a deal, honestly. Unless your Ser Criston Cole.

Poor Ser Criston Got His Heart Broken

Oh, poor Criston. My heart couldn’t help but go out to you just as much as I wanted to slap you across the face. Rhaenyra made him break vows of celibacy as part of the Kingsguard, something he deeply regrets. Being the idealist he is, he gives Rhaenyra an offer: walk away from all this madness. They can leave for Essos, forget everything, and leave the insanity behind. 

Hindsight has never felt more painful than it does here. Because if you know the story, then you know how it will likely end. What Ser Criston’s offering is the best chance Rhaenyra could get for a happy life. If this weren’t Game of Thrones, then maybe Rhaenyra would take that offer. Instead, her sense of duty, pride, and desire for the Iron Throne make her turn him down. And he’s not happy with the idea of sharing Rhaenyra with someone else. 

Again, I feel for Ser Criston. From his perspective, he feels like Rhaenyra just used him for her own amusement. The Lords and Ladies can afford that kind of slip-up, but someone common born like Ser Criston? He tarnished himself as part of the Kingsguard for nothing. It’s painful to watch, especially when he just admits it to Alicent when she lightly prods him. 

Knives Come Out With Blood in the Water

Things come to a head at the feast that’s supposed to mark the start of Rhaenyra and Laenor’s weeklong wedding celebrations. Alicent comes dressed in Hightower green, which is her way of saying to Rhaenyra, “I know what you did. I know you lied to me, and our friendship is over.” 

It gets worse. In the middle of the dancing, Ser Criston lets the guilt and resentment he’s feeling get to him, and he snaps. What happened next was a tragedy that left people horrified and me with my jaw on the floor. Thus, Rhaenyra and Laenor hastily wed in a private ceremony, even while blood lays dripping on the floor as a rat comes by.

So, to recap: two minor characters are dead. Any relationship Alicent and Ser Criston had with Rhaenyra’s damaged beyond repair. And if it’s not clarified, King Viserys won’t live to be old. 

Knives Out, Lines Drawn, Bonds Destroyed

Can someone ring the gong to announce the impending doom for the Targaryen’s? Because, as Princess Rhaenys said this episode, knives will come out. People will fight over who sits on the Iron Throne. All because they can’t accept having a woman as a leader. 

What’s especially tragic about all this is that Rhaenyra had an out. She had the chance to walk away with Ser Criston. They could’ve taken Syrax and left for parts unknown, but pride and duty made her stay. Now she must face the consequences of what comes.

This episode also marks the final appearance of Milly Alcock and Emily Carey as Rhaenyra and Alicent. Starting next episode, they’ll be played by older actresses to signify the big time skip. They both did an amazing job as these two women, and I hope they find success in the future. 

Alright, people, the knives are out. Let’s watch the Dragons tear at each other’s throats!!

I Give “We Light the Way” a 4/5

House of the Dragon S1, Ep 4 Review

Have you ever seen an TV show episode that makes you go ‘uggghhh’? Like, every character makes the wrong decisions and digs deeper into the hole they’re trapped inside? It’s frustrating to watch, especially when you like being straightforward like me. However, Westeros doesn’t care about truth. It cares about the chaos of the Game of Thrones. And, as Littlefinger will say centuries later, chaos is a ladder.

As of this week, most major characters fall down one ring on the ladder of chaos.

Daemon Returns to King’s Landing And Brings Chaos With Him

After crushing the Crabfeeder and the Triarchy pirates, Daemon got crowned King in the Narrow Sea. However, he doesn’t want that title since the Stepstones are worthless rocks. So it’s back to King’s Landing and the arms of his Brother, who forgives him thanks to winning them the Stepstones.

Sadly, he returns at the exact same time that Rhaenyra does. She’s been on a tour at her father’s behest, trying to find a husband. But like a bad Tinder experience, she swiped left on all of them. Even if she didn’t compare them to Daemon so much, though, they weren’t impressive. She’s happier with Daemon back…and even more so when he sneaks him out for a night of fun in King’s Landing.

It’s clear that Dameon’s tone away hasn’t changed his need to cause chaos. And chaos is what follows in his stead.

The Chaos of Daemon Targaryen

When people first heard that Matt Smith would be playing Daemon Targaryen, they panicked, thinking he’d be a bad fit. However, it seems that the chaotic energy he brought as the Doctor serves him well. He’s a perfect fit for Daemon.

Daemon may cause chaos in his family, but he does know what he’s doing a lot of times. Besides serving as a means to give Rhaenyra the freedom she can’t get in the Red Keep, Daemon’s night out’s meant to teach her something important. A few important things, truthfully.

Firstly, the street-play satirizing the issue of succession is meant to be a brutal truth to Rhaenyra. That truth being that even the smallfolk don’t want a woman to be Queen. And if the smallfolk don’t approve, then how can she hope to rule? This is where Daemon has an advantage over the other elite: unlike many of them, he understands the need to be loved and respected by the people. Sadly, Rhaenyra fails to learn that.

It also doesn’t help that the second of Daemon’s lessons takes her to a brothel.

Yes, it’s exactly what you think it is. But, surprisingly, Daemon doesn’t go through with doing that. He leaves at the last second!

Too bad for everyone. The chaos has already spread.

Rhaenyra Takes Charge of Herself…and Causes More Chaos

People who’ve gone through puberty knows that when most teens see others engaged in intimate acts, it’s going to affect their hormones. And getting blue-balled by the man she’s into (Daemon), Rhaenyra’s understandably frustrated. However, what she does next might be just as bad. She…sleeps with Ser Criston Cole.

Viewers would be hard-pressed to deny the romantic chemistry between Rhaenyra and Ser Criston. I saw it from a mile away. However, I didn’t expect her to act on it so soon into the show!

As much as I applaud Rhaenyra for taking charge of her love life, I wish she’d given this some more thought. Because what she does, no surprise, causes more chaos

Otto Hightower Falls Off the Chaos Ladder

From the outset, Otto Hightower’s been hated by viewers. Despite King Viserys trusting him, viewers see him for what he is: the schemer who gave up his daughter to an older man so he could put his grandchild on the Iron Throne. As such, Rhaenyra rightfully despises him, and those feelings only worsen in this episode.

After hearing from spies about where Rhaenyra and Daemon went, Otto wastes no time in bringing slanderous rumors to King Viserys. While we know nothing happened behind making out, Otto doesn’t care. He sees this as the chance to get rid of Rhaenyra he’s been waiting for.

It backfires. Big time. Rhaenyra learns about this from Alicent in a tense confrontation, and while her Dad’s rightfully pissed at her, she uses this to her advantage. As a result, Otto Hightower’s fired as Hand of the King.

It’s the smartest decision that Viserys’ made this far, but sadly, it likely won’t stick. While Rhaenyra, and now her Dad, see him as the threat to order that he is, Otto won’t go quietly. He’ll be back, one way or another.

What Chaos Has Wrought

So, despite finally winning back his brother’s favor, Daemon’s penchant for causing chaos costs him his standing. Again. His plan to force Viserys to let him wed Rhaenyra (and get the Throne) sees him sent back to the Vale.

As for Rhaenyra, she’s forced to fave the consequences of her actions. Her Dad orders her to marry Laenor Velaryon, Lord Corlys son. And take a contraceptive tea. So, despite choosing her first time, Rhaenyra still loses in the end.

Basically, chaos reigns in House Targaryen this week, and everyone’s miserable. Rhaenyra for her lot in life, Daemon for his second exile, Viserys for the headache that is his daughter, and Alicent for being a pawn of her Dad and stuck in a loveless marriage.

Westeros is fun to watch, but it sucks to live in. And, honestly, this was the show’s weakest episode thus far. And I’m not saying that because it relied on sex for drama again. Next week marks the halfway point for the series. They need to keep up the momentum.

I Give “King of the Narrow Sea” a 3.5/5

House of the Dragon S1, Ep 3 Review

I know it doesn’t need to be said at this point, but I’m saying it anyway: Westeros sucks. As much as I love the world and the plot at times, it drives me nuts how self-serving so many of the Elite are. Almost every Lord or Lady we meet does something for their gain rather than the good of all, and the people who are good people get eaten alive. Or worse, they become the thing they hate the most. This is a fact that House of the Dragon cruelly reminds us of in this week’s new episode with the arrival of the new Prince, Aegon

Aegon, Second of his Name

In the next of the show’s time skips, Kong Viserys has married Alicent as he said he would. What’s more, they now have an infant son, Aegon, and another child on the way. Everyone in court showers praise upon the Prince and act like he’s the second coming of his namesake.

Anyone who’s watched Game of Thrones long enough knows that most of this is empty flattery, trying to brown nose the King for favor. It gets to the point where even Rhaenyra’s sick of it.

Despite being made the heir, something that Viserys reminds her of, she never receives such praise, not that she wants it. Moreover, her relationship with her friend/mother-in-law, Alicent, has gotten much colder. She fears, rather rightfully, that Alicent’s children will supplant her as heir to the throne. Despite Alicent dismissing that for the moment, Rhaenyra’s right. Already, Alicent’s father is scheming to make Aegon the future King. He’s trying to pull a Tywin Lannister centuries before Tywin is born.

The Lannisters are Back

As for the Lannisters, they make their formal return in Jason Lannister, ancestor to the family we see in the show. He tries to make a marriage proposal to Rhaenyra, but arrogance must run in the Lannisters because he comes off like a self-entitled jerk. Rhaenyra flatly turns him down.

This won’t be the end to her problems, though. Now that Rhaenyra’s old enough to marry, her Dad’s been getting marriage proposals from all over. Most of them are from people who want to use her for her power, something she doesn’t want, and prompts her to run off into the Kingswood with Ser Criston Cole while the court is on this big hunt for Aegon’s birthday. Not that anyone can blame her, though. At one point, Otto Hightower suggests marrying her to her infant half-brother, Prince Aegon! Political machinations aside, how disgusting is that, marrying her to a two-year-old?

Rhaenyra+Criston Cole?

I may not be as familiar with the prequel to Game of Thrones as I would like to be, but I know chemistry when I see it. And Rhaenyra and Ser Criston have a lot of chemistry. They talk to each other so casually, and they work well together. This is made more apparent when they end up saving each other from a wild boar. Then, as if to hammer home how she’s meant to be in charge, Rhaenyra finds the White Hart her father’s lord’s have been hunting, but lets it go. In her mind, this will solidify her as the rightful next ruler of the Seven Kingdoms…which only makes what will happen harder to watch.

Not that I care. I swore I wouldn’t get emotionally attached to the characters again.

Wrath of the Dragon

Meanwhile, Prince Daemon and House Velaryon have spent the time skip fighting in the Stepstones. Their opponent is the pirate prince of the Free Cities, the Crab Feeder. Despite having a dragon on their side in the form of Caraxes, though, they continue to lose the war. Then, word reaches Daemon that his brother’s sending them aid. Rather than be happy that his brother’s helping him, Daemon snaps.

What happens next is what we anime fans would call “Pulling a Vegeta.” Daemon pretends to surrender to the Crabfeeder, but it’s an obvious lie. Despite committing what would be considered a war crime (I.E. attacking while waving the white flag), Daemon’s plan works. With all their attention on him, the pirates fail to notice the Velaryon’s and Caraxes sneak up on him until it’s too late. In the second of the episode’s big battle scenes, the Westerosi forces massacre the pirates. As for Daemon, he single-handedly slays the Crabfeeder, leaving him the undisputed ruler of the Stepstones. And he intends to let all of Westeros know he’s in charge.

A Storm is Coming to Westeros

So, by the end of the episode, the cracks continue to grow in House Targaryen as Rhaenyra continues to get ignored. And now Daemon’s ruling over the islands of the Narrow Seas. As for me, I refuse to become emotionally invested in anyone in this show. That way, I won’t be upset when characters start dropping like flies. And drop they will.

Irritation at sychophant’s aside, House of the Dragon has done good so far. Whether they can keep it up for the rest of the series will be another matter entirely. They have a chance to redeem the mistakes of the final seasons of Game of Thrones. For HBO’s sake, they shouldn’t mess it up.

I Give “Second of His Name” a 4/5

House of the Dragon S1 Ep 2 Review

If you’ve seen Game of Thrones (or read a book on Medieval Europe), you’ll know there’s one constant. That constant being that the elites would rather have a man ruling than a woman. Not many women broke that glass ceiling in the days of old, and that number’s even fewer in Westeros. Fans remember how paranoid Daenerys became when she learned Jon Snow was a Targaryen, which helped lead to her fall. She had good reason to be paranoid, as she likely knew what her ancestor, Rhaenyra, dealt with in her time. As we see in the second episode of HOTD, that disrespect continues when King Viserys makes the biggest mistake of his life. 

Also, click here if you want to see my thoughts on the new intro.

Where’s Rhaenyra’s Respect?

So, six months have passed since the death of the Queen and Viserys decided to name Rhaenyra his heir. In a nicer world, that would be the end of matters. Since this is Westeros, though, it’s not, as the Small Council keeps pressuing King Viserys to take a new wife. They argue (as does Viserys later to his daughter) that this is so that their bloodline isn’t in danger of extinction. However, their motives couldn’t be more obvious. They still want the King to have a son who can inherit the Iron Throne in place of Rhaenyra. 

Much like most of Medieval Earth, Westeros remains stuck in this sexist mindset. They think that being a good ruler means being a man. Or, as Rhaenys tells her relative:

More than anything, the show hammers home that this mindset is a big part of the reason why things will go south for House Targaryen. Much of the Small Council ignores Rhaenyra and her sound advice. While using Dragons to intimidate the Free Cities of Essos might be a bit excessive, it’s an effective tactic, and Rhaenyra’s right to suggest it. Instead, she’s brushed off as the Small Council keeps scheming to manipulate King Viserys to take a new wife. 

Marriage in Westeros Stinks!

Since child-marriage laws don’t exist in Westeros, one candidate is Laena Velaryon. Like the Targaryen’s, the Velaryon’s are one of the few survivors from Old Valyria, so the match seems perfect. Except she’s twelve in the show. Even King Viserys isn’t comfortable with that. However, who he ends up choosing ends up sealing the fates of everyone involved in this era.

Meanwhile, Daemon’s squatting on Dragonstone and refuses to move out, despite his brother’s pleas and the Small Council’s demands. Things come to a head when he flat-out steals a dragon egg and says he’s going to take a second wife himself, purely to anger the people at King’s Landing. It works, too. Otto Hightower goes to confront him and demands he leave while giving back the egg.

Rhaenyra Has More Stones Than Most Men

How did it not occur to him that would be a bad idea, since Daemon has his own dragon, Caraxes? His stupidity almost gets him killed…until Rhaenyra pulls up and gets things done.

In one move that demonstrates that she deserves the Iron Throne, Rhaenyra makes her uncle back down by calling his bluff. He doesn’t act like it, but he does love his family; or at least his niece. Thus, he goes to vacate Dragonstone, and returns the egg.

What does Daenerys get for acting decisively? No recognition beyond a reprimand from her concerned father. While King Viserys has the right to scold her, he should also praise her for defusing the mess his Hand caused. Later, it doesn’t even appear that Otto feels grateful as he continues his schemes for power.

The Sound of Doom For All

And they work. King Viserys announces that he’s going to wed Otto’s daughter and Rhaenyra’s best friend, Alicent. It’s a move no one besides the Hightower’s are happy over. Corlys Velaryon, his master of ships and relative by marriage, walks out on the Small Council and decides to team up with Daemon to head to the Stepstones and clear out the pirates there.

So, by the end of this, King Viserys has let the Game of Thrones make him make what viewers know is a terrible mistake. By remarrying, he will have to have more children. And since one of them will be a son, that will put Rhaenyra’s claim to the throne in question. He’s undermining his own family’s power. 

The seeds are already sewn, though. The House of the Dragon’s going to go through its greatest crisis ever. And if you know the history of Westeros, then you know that it won’t end well for anyone. So, good going, King Viserys.

This is why I’m not trying to get attached to anyone in this show. 

I Give “The Rogue Prince” a 4/5