RJ Writing Ink

The First Spongebob Christmas Special

This special has been on long enough that I don’t think I need to explain much about the plot. So let’s just go over the basics.

After Sandy teaches Spongebob about the concept of Christmas, he shares the holiday with the rest of Bikini Bottom, and soon everyone is in on it. Everyone except for Squidward, who thinks everyone is being stupid.

So Christmas Eve comes, and Squidward is being the Scrooge who refuses to celebrate the holiday. So while everyone is waiting for Santa to come, he goes to sleep. Santa doesn’t show up, and everyone becomes disillusioned with the holiday. Even Spongebob tearfully admits that Squidward was right. Feeling guilty, Squidward decides to dress up as Santa to make Spongebob happy, and then ends up giving away all his stuff as gifts. Then the real Santa shows up and thanks him.

Good Times With Spongebob

As a kid who was making the transition from Nick Jr. to Nickelodeon proper, this was one of the first Christmas specials that I saw growing up, and I loved it. I was a huge Spongebob fan throughout my childhood and tried to emulate him as much as possible. I enjoyed watching his Christmas special every year. That being said, there was one thing about the special that always bugged me: why did everyone stay up to wait for Santa?

As a kid growing up, I was always taught that if you wanted Santa Claus to show up, then you needed to go to sleep so that he wouldn’t be seen. Granted, I know that that was so that parents could put out the presents. Why wouldn’t Sandy tell him that? Most kids will know that idea.

Furthermore, I get why Squidward wanted to rub the fact that he was right in Spongebob’s face. I would be probably be annoyed by Spongebob’s attempts to get him into the holiday spirit. But being right doesn’t give him the right to be a total jackass. Even so, I think Squidward’s decision to dress up as Santa was one of the nicest things I’ve ever seen him do. Too bad I don’t see him do that any more.

In all, though, this remains one of my all-time favorite Christmas Specials, and I hope that you guys have a Merry Christmas.

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Yes, people, I am a Brony, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. I never cared for My Little Pony at first, thought it was not for me. But then I saw Rainbow Dash beat the circuits out of Starscream in an episode of Death Battle:

And then Pinkie Pie fighting Deadpool:

And then Twilight Sparkle fought Raven.

The point being, the ponies from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic are pretty cool. Unlike previous versions, the characters in this version are not overly “girly” and go on funny and exciting adventures. But I’m not here to talk about the show outright. Today, I want to talk about their new holiday special, The Best Gift Ever.

My Little Pony: The Best Gift Ever

It’s the day before Hearth’s Warming Eve, the Equestrian equivalent to Christmas, and the Mane Six is busy trying to get each other gifts. And Twilight is… having her holiday meltdown from the stress of getting gifts for everyone. And preparing for her family to visit.

So Applejack suggests that they do a Hearth’s Warming helper (AKA a Secret Santa). So the gang goes their separate ways to find the perfect gifts for each other:

• Rarity heads to recover the gift she got for Applejack after it got sent to the wrong address
• Discord tags along with Rainbow Dash to get Fluttershy a new pet
• Fluttershy and Applejack head to a craft fair for gifts for Spike and Rainbow Dash
• Spike wants to get Rarity the best gift ever (because he loves her).
• Pinkie Pie heads to a trio of Reindeer to get a gift for Twilight.
• And Twilight’s gift for Pinkie Pie?

It wouldn’t be an adventure, though, if they didn’t run into hijinks. So things end up getting crazy, and no one ends up getting the gifts they wanted to give.

That’s alright, though, because, like any episode of My Little Pony, there’s a moral behind everything. The moral in this case is that you shouldn’t stress so much about what to get your friends and family for the holiday season. Getting gifts is always fun, but the best gift can be just spending time with loved ones and enjoying yourself. That’s what the holidays are for!

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s mention the touches that I liked about this special- in photo form!

So, yeah, the message of the story is one that has been told a thousand times, but I don’t think that that is a bad thing as long as it’s told in a fun way. And considering how much care Hasbro, the cast, and writers of the show put into it, I’d say that it was plenty of fun. I know I enjoyed it, at least.

Don’t go anywhere yet! I’ve got a bevy of more blogs that I want to do today! Then, check back tomorrow as I go over a bonus movie, recap the year, and what I look forward to in 2019.

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The year 1968. The way I see it, it was one of the the worst years in American history. It started with the Tet Offensive: dozens of strikes by Viet Cong and North Vietnamese agents across South Vietnam. It awoke Americans to the fact that, despite everything their government told them, the Vietnam War was not going their way. Then in April, the Civil Rights Movement lost one of its greatest champions. Martin Luther King Jr.’s assassination triggered riots across the country poured out their grief. Then, a few short months later, presdiential candidate Robert Kennedy was assassinated. It must have felt like the world was caving in. America needed something good to end the year on. What it got can only be described as a kind of magic. Magic that comes from being in the right place in the right time and making history. We got Earthrise.

For seven years, NASA had been moving step by step in its exploration of space. The endgame: landing a man on the moon and return him home before the decade was out. With less than a year left before the deadline, NASA decided to speed up its plans: they would travel all the way to the moon before the year’s end. So, on December 21st, 1968, a Saturn V rocket carried three men, Frank Borman, Jim Lovell, and Bill Anders, to deep space. For the first time, humanity would leave Earth behind and head for deep space. They weren’t even sure if they could make it to the moon. Even the astronauts said the odds of success were fifty-fifty.

Three days later, Christmas Eve, 1968. Apollo 8 prepared for the burn that would place it in orbit around the moon. For several tense minutes, there would be no contact between Earth and the crew. Down to the very second, the crew reported in. It was one of the most important events in human history. But that was nothing compared to what the crew and the people on Earth saw next. I’m not going to even bother describing it, just watch this clip:

I wasn’t alive when this moment happened, but when I learned about the story about this moment, I felt like I was going to cry from how beautiful it was. To see the world that we called our home, the only place in the universe that we can call our home, and then to hear the crew of Apollo 8 read from the Book of Genesis, on Christmas Eve no less! I know it sounds cheesy, but it feels it like was true miracle, the greatest gift humanity had ever gotten. The Christmas that mankind saw its home as it truly was, something very special.

Mankind needed Earthrise when it happened. The year had seen pain and hardship and turmoil. America had opened its eyes to the war it was fighting, it felt loss, and then despair. But in just a few moments, all that hardship was erased by the sight of our home. And mankind knew how important that moment was. Time chose the crew of Apollo 8 as its Men of the Year. After the crew came back, Frank Borman recieved a simple telegram that sums the importance of Earthrise:

Thank you, Apollo 8. You saved 1968.

Fifty years tonight since that fateful moment, and so much has changed. 2018 has seen its fair share of triumphs and losses. Movie history was made, there were controversies, tragedies, and the loss of great people (Stan Lee, Stephen Hillenberg, and more). We could use something like Earthrise again, but I think we can do something just as good. Tonight, look at one of the greatest photo’s in human history and remember what we can do with the will and drive to succeed. If we can go to the moon, then we are just as capable of solving the many problems our world is facing. Good night, Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays no matter who you are or where you come from.

People, I believe that I have now hit rock bottom on Christmas Specials. Why? Because I just found the Christmas Episode for last season of American Dad. I was into American Dad for a time, along with Seth Macfarlane’s other shows (even got his autograph). But then I grew out of them. But then I saw this special and decided to give it another shot.

American Dad Christmas

Two things you need to know about American Dad: it’s about the family of extremely conservative CIA agent Stan Smith, and every Christmas Special has seen something bad happen to them. Past examples include:

• Getting separated by the Rapture
• Fighting the Anti-Christ. Twice!
• Stan wishing to be single for Christmas only to end up with the wrong family after the wish was undone
• Santa sending an army of elves to kill them
• Santa killing Stan’s dad and turning him into Krampus

Bottom line, the Smiths and Christmas don’t mix. So in this episode, Stan decides to just bail on the whole thing and have the Smiths go into stasis for the day to wait out the holiday. Except for his son, Steve, is isn’t ready to give up on Christmas and runs off to ride a train. But then that train full of kids gets kidnapped and taken to the North Pole by Santa.

Crazy Plan

Apparently, Santa needs them as slave labor in his mines to search for these magical gemstones. They were once part of the eyes of this mythical giant that was slain by the ancient Sumerian hero Gilgamesh and granting him godly power. Santa’s plan is to use them to do the same thing to himself.

Why, though? What on earth does he possibly have to gain from such a convoluted plan? That’s really dumb, but also cool at the same time. But still dumb! That is literally what I thought to myself while I was watching this episode! I admit that this episode had an interesting premise, but it didn’t really do much to make me think of the Christmas spirit. In fact, the revelation that Santa set up everything just for a ridiculous plot to become a god made Steve finally hate Christmas. Thankfully, the hate doesn’t last long and by the end Steve likes Christmas again. Oh, and Santa and the elves got sucked into the giant’s mouth, but then we see his hand climb out the neck in dramatic fashion.

Not a traditional Christmas Special, by far, but this is adult animation. So it gets a pass. I think I need to go have some eggnog after this. American Dad can be weird at times.

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I would like to thank cakedablerd from Pop Culture Uncovered for giving me the idea to watch this. Go check out her original post. I have never been one for work by Sanrio, but Aggretsuko might be an exception, especially since the main character is the opposite of Hello Kitty. Retsuko is a 25-year-old accountant in some random company… and she hates every minute of it. A lot of her co-workers are annoying, her boss is a jerk, and she just wants out. A lot of people can relate. Most of her co-workers don’t know, but she channels her anger by singing death metal karaoke.

So, I spent a whole day binge watching the first season, because the Christmas Special came out today: We Wish You A Metal Christmas.

We Wish You A Metal Christmas

If you remember my posts about the Fairy Tail and Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid Christmas Specials, you may remember that I said Christmas is more about romance in Japan. That, and eating KFC, but that’s beside the point. It’s Christmas Eve, and everyone is making plans for the holiday. Everyone except for Retsuko. She’s been too busy trying to get Instagram likes to make plans, and then her jerk-boss, Ton the pig, gives her extra work. Because he’s a jerk.

Meanwhile, Retsuko’s friends, Haida and Fenneko are out drinking. Haida has had a crush on Retsuko, but she turned him down, and he still hasn’t gotten over it. So he’s getting wasted to get over the pain. Especially since he thinks Retsuko has plans.

Fortunately for him, Fenneko’s social media detective skills help her realize that something’s up with Retsuko’s Instagram posts and that she doesn’t have anything to do for Christmas Eve. So Haida tries to rush over and help her, only to find out she already left. Love is never easy.

Luck is on Haida’s side, though, as he happens to run into her as she’s out with some of her friends, and they end up getting some time together. It’s a cute way to end the episode, but the clincher is the heavy metal version of “Jingle Bells”. I never knew how badly I needed that.

Retsuko Is an Exception

As I said before, Sanrio is normally not my cup of eggnog, but I’m glad I tried this show out. It’s got enough of anime in it to keep me interested, while the premise is relatable enough for non-anime fans to get into it. What makes this enjoyable, though, is that it serves as a reminder of how no one should be alone for the holidays. Yet many people out there are. They don’t have any family or friends nearby, so the holidays can be a sad and lonely experience. But when you have people you care about with you, they become a lot brighter.

I also find this to be an interesting commentary on how some in our generation go out of their way to look amazing on social media to make up for the fact that they don’t like where they are right now. While stuck at work, Retsuko even fakes a fancy dinner photo just get people’s approval.

My advice: social media is fun, but it doesn’t beat having physical friends to hang out with. But I don’t want to preach, so instead, I’ll wish you a Merry Christmas!

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I thought that I had seen a lot of good Christmas movies, and maybe some bad Christmas movies. But when I saw that Netflix had a new Christmas movie, I had no idea what to think. So I got on my laptop, put on Netflix and put on The Christmas Chronicles to see the funniest Santa yet.

The Christmas Chronicles

It’s about this family, the Pierces in Massachusetts. They have loved Christmas as much as any family could, especially the dad. But when their Dad, a firefighter, dies while rescuing some people, the kids, Teddy and Kate, start to drift apart from each other.

Come Christmas Eve 2018, Mrs. Pierce has to cover for a coworker, forcing Teddy and Kate to be home alone for Christmas. When Kate thinks she sees Santa on a recording of last year’s Christmas, she does what any kid would do: stay up and try to see Santa. I tried doing it as a kid, and I know plenty of other people did.

Not only do Kate and Teddy see Santa, though, but they also manage to sneak aboard his sleigh. Then they cause it to crash, the sack to fly off, and the Reindeer to scatter in Chicago. What’s worse, without any of these things, Santa can’t do his job. And when he can’t do his job, bad things happen. As Santa, puts it, the Dark Ages and all the rotten stuff that came with it. So it’s up to Teddy and Kate to help Santa save Christmas while also conveniently restoring their bond as siblings.

One of My Top 5 Santas

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s talk about the movie’s version of Santa, played by Kurt Russell. I loved Kurt Russell as Santa. Unlike the way he’s normally portrayed in pop culture, this Santa is of reasonable weight and is a wise-cracking, savvy toy-maker. It’s hard to describe, but if I had to explain it, I’d say that Kurt Russell makes Santa seem more… human. As in he’s not always so jolly. He can be sarcastic, energetic, happy, charismatic. He’s very charismatic. At one point in the film, when he lands in jail (don’t ask), he leads the inmates in a jazz rendition of “Santa Claus Is Back in Town”. It’s amazing! He does refuse to go “ho ho ho”, though, because he says that’s a myth. Apparently along with him being fat. In short, I love Kurt Russell as Santa.

And the elves! They are like the Gremlins crossed with the Minions from Despicable Me. They are cute, they are mischievous, and you will either love them or hate them.

The Kids

Lastly, we have the kids, Teddy and Kate Pierce. At the start, it was shown that they both have some problems. More like Teddy has problems. Ever since his dad died, he’s been falling in with the wrong crowd. Kate follows him at one point early on in the film, and sees him steal a car with some other teenagers! The worst part is that that is never actually resolved. His night before Christmas experience sets him back on the right path, but he never actually tells his mom of what he did or makes any amends for it. That seems like lazy writing.

I’d talk more about what happens, but I don’t want to spoil the ending. I liked this movie, and if you have Netflix, I urge you to watch it. It’s a pretty good Christmas movie with a new spin on Santa. Kurt Russell became my second favorite Santa of all time after watching this. The first is Ed Asner. Happy holidays!

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Just because I am a grown-up does not mean I have to stop loving cartoons, especially when said cartoons are excellent. Over the last few years, Cartoon Network has been on a roll, making shows that have appealed to both child and adult demographics. First, there was Adventure Time, then Regular Show, and we have Steven Universe. Rebecca Sugar’s creation is one of the best shows on Cartoon Network right now, and with next batch of episodes coming out, I thought it’d be appropriate to look at the Steven Universe Christmas episode.

It’s not blatantly stated to be a Christmas episode, but watch it and tell me if it doesn’t remind you of anything Christmas related. So, here it is, Three Gems and a Baby.

Baby Steven Universe

As Beach City is being covered by a blizzard, Greg Universe and the Crystal Gems tell Steven the story of his first winter with Steven. 

In flashback, Greg is shown taking care of baby Steven whilestaying at a friend’s house in the middle of a blizzard. He does a good job atit, as well, though he gets a little confused about Steven’s need to expose his gem.

Now, when I first saw this episode, I started to get some serious baby Jesus vibes from it, whether intentional or not. First, Steven was not a normal baby. He was born through very unconventional means. Unlike Jesus, though, Steven is the son of a human and an alien. 

The comparisons don’t stop, as the Gems show up bearing gifts for the newborn Steven. Sound familiar? Well, the Gems gifts are mostly impractical. Why would a baby need a razor, after all? 

Everything changes when Steven’s gem starts glowing. The Gems are convinced it’s Rose trying to talk to them, and while Greg tries to figure out what’s going on, the Gems basically… kidnap Steven. Along with Greg’s van.

Steven Goes for a Ride

It was funny to watch the Gems try and figure out what Steven was, only to fail and make him upset. Even though Pearl thinks she can bring back Rose by removing Steven’s gem, she can’t do it. Reluctantly, the Gems have to face the fact that Rose may be gone for good, and that they need to focus on Steven now.

Then Greg shows up being chased by a dog and they make up. Back in the present, Steven can’t help but point out how the Gems were wrong about growing and changing is not natural for them, as they have all changed for the better.

Steven Universe=Gem Jesus

In hindsight, it is easy to see the comparisons between the story of baby Jesus and Steven. Considering everything that has happened with Steven, and the revelation that his mom was actually PINK DIAMOND, I can’t help but wonder if this was intentional.

Think about it: Steven is a special boy, born from a human father and a Gem mother. He has all the abilities of both Gems and Humans, and he has spent his entire life trying to help others, even if they were once his enemies. After he learns the truth about his mom, he tries to make peace with the other Diamonds. With the remainder of the “Diamond Days” coming up, I keep coming back to this episode and the comparisons. One thing keeps crossing my mind: does Rebecca Sugar mean for Steven to become a sort of savior or uniter of the Gems?

Steven Universe is part Gem, and a Diamond, one of the leaders, at that. Maybe he is meant to bring about a significant change in Gem society. This is just me speculating, but with recent events, I knew I had to re-watch this episode. It’s not just a Christmas episode, it may be a direct hint by the show’s writers about what Steven’s destiny may be. Or not. I don’t mind being wrong.

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Earlier in the month, I did a writing about a Dragon Ball Z Abridged Christmas Special: The Christmas Tree of Might. Last year, Team Four Star produced a follow up: The Plan to Eradicate Christmas. I was browsing through the internet, and I thought it would be fun to watch this again. 

Like Christmas Tree of Might, this is not really a Christmas Special. This is actually based on an OVA that came with the game Dragon Ball Z: Raging Blast 2. Plan to Eradicate the Saiyans was about a supercomputer made by a species the Saiyans wiped out trying to get revenge for it’s deceased creators. That is disregarded in this special.

Evil Santa

In keeping with the Christmas theme, this special sees the Earth being threatened by a giant cloud of coal dust and naughtiness, and the ghost’s of Christmas Villains past. You know how this song and dance goes. Fight, Goku and allies first lose, they rally and win. 

What I liked about this special is that it once again shows how creative Team Four Star is able to get with their work. They took an OVA that had nothing to do with Christmas and make it into a holiday special. They even added Santa Claus into it.

Everyone is Naughty! Except Gohan!

Speaking of Santa, he’s the one behind this mess. Team Four Star must have taken a page from the evil robot Santa from Futurama, because this Santa has deemed everyone on Earth naughty. And the Saiyans and Piccolo are at the top. Piccolo for him and his dad trying to take over the world, Trunks for the time travel thing, and Vegeta. Dear god, where do we begin? But Goku is the worst because he’s put the universe at risk. And as if to prove a point, Team Four Star puts up an ad to the watch the Tournament of Power arc on Crunchyroll. Gohan is the only one who’s on the nice list.

So, Santa has clearly gone evil, which means the group has to waste him. To the tune of “Carol of the Bells”, which was one of the best things I’ve ever seen.

So, Santa is dead, but the point the group is about more than just Santa. I know that’s been said time and again, but we still need to hear every now and then. After that, everyone goes home to Goku’s home for Christmas dinner. Even Vegeta, and he hates everyone. Christmas miracle.

So, that was a traditional Saiyan Christmas, I guess. It was, it was weird. I wonder if Team Four Star would do another Hellsing Christmas Special? I got to go find out! Or maybe they’ll done another Dragon Ball Z Abridged Special for Christmas!

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Hey, it’s me. I just wanted to say that I’m sorry again for missing out on last night. My bad! Let’s put that behind us and talk about the Christmas Episode I watched today: Merry Christmas Mordecai, from Regular Show.

This premiered alongside The White Elephant Gift Exchange, but I’m doing them separate for a reason: I like White Elephant more. To be honest, I was dreading this episode.

Margaret had left for college at the end of Season 4, leaving Mordecai heartbroken. Then he ended up bumping into CJ at that New Year’s party, they started hanging out, and then they started dating. Even though I did like seeing them dating (and Real Date is one of my favorite episodes of the show), I was against it at first. The reason was because, in the back of my mind, I knew that Margaret might come back. When and if that happened, this was going to lead to an awkward love triangle. Lo and behold, I WAS RIGHT! 

The entire special revolves around Mordecai wigging out, or as Rigby calls “pulling a Mordecai” and trying to keep things from getting awkward. Thankfully, CJ was perfectly understanding about Mordecai’s plight and shook it off. After that, everything seemed like it was going to work out. That is, until Mordecai and Margaret get caught up in their good memories and kiss each other!

Then, because the plot demands it, CJ inconveniently comes in and sees them kissing, and runs off before Mordecai can explain or apologize. In other words, my worst fear came true. Then it got worse. Margaret is now Eileen’s new roommate. From here on out, things were going to get awkward.

If you watched the show in its entirety, you know that CJ was never able to truly get over her jealousy of Margaret, which led to her and Mordecai’s eventual break-up. Considering how CJ is no longer a main character after Season 6, I consider this to be a huge waste. At the same time, I have to acknowledge how this special ends up being a huge milestone in the show’s plot. It may be my least favorite of the Regular Show Christmas Specials, but it’s still good. After all, it’s Regular Show.

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South Park and Christmas

Howdy-ho, people! It’s time for another 25 days of Christmas. Since South Park will be wrapping up its 22nd season, I thought it would be appropriate to cover one of their Christmas specials.

More than any other show on TV, South Park has a strong connection to Christmas. The whole reason the show even exists is that Matt Stone and Trey Parker made a short film in their college days called “The Spirit of Christmas” that parodied Frosty the Snowman

Then that Executive from Fox asked them to make a sequel for a video Christmas Card called “Jesus vs. Santa”

The rest is history. Rather than argue about which South Park Christmas Special was the best, I’m skipping that and going with the one I loved the most: Woodland Critter Christmas

A Twisted Woodland Critter Christmas

This is one of the funniest and most original Christmas Specials I have ever seen, and I love every minute of it! It starts off like a simple Rankin/Bass special, with a bunch of cute little animals who “befriend” Stan Marsh and get him to kill the mountain lion that keeps eating the chosen mother of their savior. 

Since it’s South Park, though, nothing is ever that simple. The writers make everyone feel bad when it’s revealed the lion had three cubs. But then they pulled a plot twist on us by revealing the critters are Satanists giving birth to the Anti-Christ! I wasn’t sure if I should be laughing or just saying “Stan, dude, you f***d up big time”.

So even though Stan just wants to forget about everything, the Narrator forces him to go back and stop the critters. That goes about as well as you think, so he has to take the lion cubs to learn abortions so they can kill the Anti-Christ.

Oh, and the critters kidnap Kyle to use him as a vessel for the Anti-Christ.

So the Anti-Christ is born, and now the only one able to stop the madness is Santa, who rides in on his sleigh with a shotgun and kills them all, only for Kyle to let himself be possessed. PLOT TWIST!

Cartman’s Story

The best part, though, is when it’s revealed that everything that’s happened was part of a story Cartman made for class. Kyle tries to stop it, but everyone wants to know what happens next. If I were his teacher, I know I would be curious myself. This was a good story. It also explains why there is another son of the devil. Damian hasn’t been seen since Season 1, but he’s still there. Also, the Satan in South Park can be a chill guy.

So the Mountain Lions abort the Anti-Christ, though how, I don’t know. All that matters is that it’s dead. And as a reward for Stan, Santa uses his magic to bring back the mountain lion mom. 

I have been a fan of South Park for years, and I always look forward to seeing what they make fun of each week. I especially love their holiday specials, and this was one of their best ones ever. After this, there was nearly a ten year gap in Christmas Specials for South Park, so if this was going to have been their final one, they went out with a bang. It’s a great parody of Christmas Specials, though of what, I don’t know.

Who cares? Cartman probably got an A+, Christmas was saved, and everyone lived happily ever after… except for Kyle, who died of AIDS two weeks later. I knew Cartman would jab at Kyle. MERRY WOODLAND CRITTER CHRISTMAS!

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